Just a brief update that I need to write as much for my own memory as for your reading pleasure.
Our bedtime battles have been epic since the boys moved into beds two months ago. I should probably be grateful that they don’t get out of their room or call/cry for us. However, they disturb us in just about every other way. They’ve disheveled drawers and closets, broken blinds, run around the room and talked or sang loudly for hours into the night, woken up very early ready to play with one another, and generally done just about everything to prove to us we’ve lost all control over them. It’s truly not that dramatic and we have seen some improvements, but I must say the one thing I’ve always relied on is knowing we have a nightly 12-hour break. Now, it’s not so dependable. And, I’m not quite ready to do away with all afternoon rest to see if they’d be so worn out by bedtime that they’d just collapse. I’m afraid if I did this, I’d be the only one collapsing at 7pm.
What I’ve done for about a month–and what I really wanted to report on today–is separate them during nap/quiet time in the afternoons. Without that, the idea of nap or rest or break is impossible. I’d like to think it is for their benefit that they get the break, but it’s undoubtedly of great benefit to me. Several months ago we instituted a “Child of the Day.” It rotates between each child on a daily basis and this person gets the privilege of making some of the choices required that day (such as the the blessing at meals, music in the car, snacks, an activity, and the bedtime book). It seems to cut down on some disagreements when they know they will get their turn another day. I’m also beginning to implement a chore or task for the Child of the Day to increase their responsibility. Well, now the Child of the Day gets to be by himself in his room and bed during nap. This is where it gets interesting:
–James rarely sleeps on his day in his bed. Instead, he likes to stand on his bed and stare out the window (from which he methodically broke the blinds to create a permanent peep hole gap). He told me all about the trash truck and the method it has for picking up Christmas trees. When I ask him about how he spends his time in his room, he usually says something about watching things and being curious about what’s going on outside.
–Thomas usually sleeps heavily, but the days he’s in his bed, he snuggles, cozies up and rests very soundly. It’s like he’s grateful for his own bed and his own space without interruption.
–Jack is a bit of a wild card. He’s normally our most obedient child, but when it comes to time in his room, he’s our biggest problem (both when he’s with his brothers and alone). On one recent nap alone in his room, he got destructive with some toys and the blinds. Yet, on another, he had VERY NEATLY set out outfits for each of his brothers and himself and straightened out the sock/underwear drawer. He rarely sleeps in the afternoon whether alone or with the others.
I want to share one more funny story. Not too long ago, the children started wanting to hold hands during our blessing at dinner. James usually gets very upset if we don’t hold hands. However, Jack (who sits beside both Thomas and me) will hold my hand, but only extend his elbow to Thomas, who then gets hysterical. It is comical, but dinner rarely starts on a positive note when Thomas and Jack try to escape the hand holding at dinner (for T to not be rejected and for Jack to avoid it altogether) and James is doing his darnedest to make sure everyone does hold hands.
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The Barry Patch 