Ellie received her second report card last week and continues to excel in school. It’s clear she’s learning and growing well, despite coming in at an advanced level. It’s reassuring that her teacher is attuned to her areas of growth and finding ways to challenge her. Ellie continues to enjoy school and has little complaints about it.
Jack, James, and Thomas just had their preschool conferences. Wes and I were relieved and pleasantly surprised in many ways. It’s easy for us to get caught up in the day to day details and miss the bigger picture of what they’re doing and how they’re behaving. We were quite happy to learn that the boys are all bright, kind, respectful, and a joy to have in class. They clearly have their teachers fooled! It was funny, however, that some of the teachers’ observations were the complete OPPOSITE of how they behave at home. Those of you who follow the blog closely or know our boys well, will find some of these comments funny, too:
The teacher finds James to be extremely kind; he routinely gives up his toy if someone else wants it and he looks out for others. He loves all the different activities and centers in the classroom and engages in a variety of activities. I assure you that the following quote from his teacher are words nobody else has used to describe him: “a wonderful, loving, and gentle soul.” I’ve thought a lot about James today and wondered why I have a more negative perception of him. I’m blessed by this feedback from the teacher, as I think it liberates me and challenges me to love him with more grace.
Most of what the teacher reported about Thomas is consistent with what happens at home. His enthusiasm and eagerness stand out. What was surprising was her report that he is quiet. Thomas literally never stops talking at home. The teacher described Thomas as sweet, bright, sociable with lots of children, able to play rough and tumble and also sit attentively when required, and a quick and enthusiastic learner.
We spent a larger chunk of our time discussing Jack. Jack’s just a bit quirky in ways both positive and a little less so. The teacher reported that he enjoys manipulatives, puzzles, trucks, cars, and science or math activities. He’s also very talkative and inquisitive, and she said he frequently asks “why?” Her opinion that he’s a little delayed socially and emotionally was helpful. He seems to be functioning in these areas a few months behind his peers (and his brothers, in particular), which is probably why he seems a bit challenging to figure out at times. The sense is that he’ll catch up and figure it out on his own by grade school, but that for now, we’re just going to see him as a bit different from his brothers in some aspects of his development. At the same time, he’s quite bright and does well cognitively, so our work in speech therapy and in social skills are going to be most valuable. The following statement from the teacher was most poignant to me: “Jack loves to play with the guys (meaning his brothers and several other boys) and tries hard to keep up.” This tugs at my heart because I sense in it that he must feel a little discouraged and frustrated by all he wants to do and just can’t right now. He’s particular and perfectionistic and, as his mom, I just want to make things easy for him and give him opportunities to feel successful. It’s all minor stuff, but I want to be cognizant of what we can do to help him so that he can fully participate when he wants to and not feel like an observer or outsider.
Overall, we are extremely grateful and pleased and we have a lot to cherish. We try hard to do the best we can as their parents and we don’t often get much feedback that our work is paying off. Though much of these positive stories and attributes are well beyond anything we can take credit for, it’s still validating and encouraging to have a teacher’s perspective.
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